June 19, 2007

Fun with Jiffy Pop!

Posted in Apropos of nothing at 4:57 pm by The Lizard Queen

When Selling His Head and the Kafkaesque K (who never post anymore, but I won’t remove them from my blogroll because they’re a couple of my closest friends from New Mexico — and now I see that SHH’s blog is, in fact, gone) came to visit (they now live in Texas’s Aggieland) in March, the three of us plus Evil Bender went to Target. SHH picked up an old-school package of Jiffy Pop from Target’s $1 section, and said package ended up taking up residence in my kitchen. Today Evil Bender decided he wanted some popcorn, and so dug out the Jiffy Pop.

“Hmm,” Evil Bender muttered from the kitchen. “I’d follow the instructions, but there don’t appear to be any.”

I was reclining on the couch, a position from which I was reluctant to move because it is hot. I extended my arm back toward the kitchen. “Lemme see.”

Evil Bender handed the package over. I found, at the top of the label, instructions for opening. “Gently lift this tab & pull along dotted line,” it told me. I lifted what appeared to be the tab in question, pulled back a bit, then paused. “What dotted line?  There’s no dotted line!”

“See what I mean?”

I grumbled assent, but then noticed a tab underneath with what appeared to be further instructions. I could only read “directions” and “this tab.” So I pulled on it. It came off, and I discovered I was now holding, separate from the rest of the package, a tab that stated “DO NOT REMOVE THIS TAB.” I finished removing the cover, on the back of which the instructions were printed, and handed the instructions and package over to Evil Bender. We looked at the removed tab with amusement, tinged with perhaps a bit of apprehension (though I feel I should inform you that the popcorn popped up without incident).

“You should totally blog about this,” Evil Bender finally concluded.

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5 Comments »

  1. Evil Bender said,

    I would like to note that this story is not exaggerated. At all.

  2. beverly said,

    Too funny!!

  3. luaphacim said,

    tee hee!

    Your life is like a real-life Pokey the Penguin!

  4. why cough in texas said,

    So glad to hear you enjoyed the popcorn. Next time I’ll leave behind a slinky without the instructions. Just to keep your lives interesting.

  5. Jiffy said,

    What is the purpose of the TAB?


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